A proper update on Nugget soon, but first, I really want to put this out there:
I don’t support the whole passing-the-baby around thing AT ALL. I believe that babies – particularly my son – are people in their own right and deserve to be treated as such. They deserve as much space & consideration as you would give an adult or someone who can speak and CHOOSE to say “pick me up” or “put me down.”
It can be overwhelming to suddenly be surrounded by many new faces & then passed around like a toy, particularly for a baby who may be tired and has recently traveled a long distance. People may say that he’s “fine”, but as a mother who is very attuned to her child & who often talks about what he likes and prefers – I know him best. Do not challenge me.
I’m angry at myself for not being more vocal about this at the appropriate moments. I should have been more protective and I certainly should have demanded more respect for myself, as the mother. ALWAYS ask first and defer to the mother. ALWAYS. And if someone doesn’t back off after being asked, that’s about as disrespectful & rude as a person can get.
It’s my fault for not saying something immediately, but I’m saying it now. I will not allow my child to be passed around. If you want to hold him, you ask me first (excluding grandparents, of course.) If you want to argue with me about it, sucks to be you. When it comes to my child, I make the rules. How would other people feel if I came in and challenged & ignored the ways they raise their children? And I guarantee you, I probably disagree with most of them. If you want to hold him, and I sense that you’re making it all about you & not about wanting to be close to my son, then the answer will be NO. He is not a toy. He is not a novelty. He is not a cute, fluffy little creature to be tossed about for others’ amusement.
I don’t care what anyone thinks of me for saying this, because my priority is MY SON. I think it’s sad that everyone doesn’t respect their babies as real people with a sense of self, personal space, and boundaries. My son will be all the better for it.
So. The lesson for today? Unless you are a grandparent of said child, don’t even think about picking him up unless you’ve asked and gotten the ok to do so. Just think of me as a mother bear, but more dangerous.